Barriers and Eye Contact Create Mystery and Romance in Relationships
Post date: 2008-12-04
One of the most difficult aspects of finding a woman is learning how to signal your interest without being a complete turn off. Men who believe that they are really seriously fantastic tend to walk up to women and it looks like they score. You know the kind of guy, he’s really attractive, in perfect health, and probably even has a perfectly even pearly white smile. He knows he looks good and that women eat him up. But he hasn’t scored.
He might be taking her home for a night and sure, they’re going to have a really good time. But he hasn’t scored because in the morning or later that night one of them will go home and he will be lonely again until he picks up his next conquest.
Looking like a prince isn’t the only factor in finding a great woman. Women are attracted to all kinds of various qualities, including integrity, humor, fun, and of course the ability to make her feel as though she is the only woman that matters on the entire planet. Women aren’t always interested in the prince of the room. Chances are that you have all that it takes to really connect with a fabulous woman and to end up being her only prince in the room regardless of the competition.
When a man and a woman are in the same room but have yet to be introduced or have yet to introduce themselves, there is a mysterious barrier that often prevents them from simply walking up and striking up a conversation. There are glances back and forth, a little eye contact if you’re lucky, and a whole mess of visual cues indicating communicated desire. The way you learn to communicate with your eyes is huge factor in whether the evening ends with her number or ends alone.
Guys often think that if they stare her down, or get caught looking at her often enough, that she’ll figure out that he’s interested. This is not entirely accurate but yet it has an element of truth. First of all, when a woman feels as though she is being stared at she actually becomes uncomfortable. Do not sit there and burn a hole in her with your eyes. Give a few “caught in the act” glances to let your interest be known, but don’t gawk at her. When she has made a little eye contact in your direction or is flitting her glance from you to quickly looking away, there is a high probability that she is interested. This would be your cue to either approach her or to find a way to approach her later.
When women get up and go to the restroom it is not always an indication that they want to be followed. This is a mistake that Hollywood has given us by setting up scenes where she is suddenly willing to cheat on her man with the handsome antagonist for a quick thrill in the restroom while he is innocently out there waiting for her return. If she is with someone, she will let you know if she is interested, otherwise back off. If she is not, the restroom is often the place women turn to in order to gather their composure.
If the two of you spend an entire evening glancing back and forth, eventually there will be other indicators that allow you to break through your own personal barriers and face your desire to walk over and talk to her. In many cases, a smile will break through and there will be some obvious open body language. Initial eye contact is very important, but tuning into some of the other posturing and body language is just as important. Never make an entire assumption based solely on tiny glances. She might just be picking up on the fact that you are looking at her and she is trying to feel comfortable with that. Sometimes a furtive glance doesn’t indicate interest, but it is the opening to further communication.
If you aren’t sure but you decide to take a chance, then go ahead and go talk to her. At this stage you are really just doing a brief fact finding mission. Is she with someone? Is she hoping you will come over to her? Doesn’t she think you’re looking smashing this evening? All of these questions can be answered without the fear of bring turned down. You haven’t asked anything. You are just looking to see where she is coming from in order to determine where you want to go from here. There is absolutely nothing wrong with these little fact finding missions. Granted, if she is with another guy he might not take to it very well. But if she isn’t, then you can wipe your fears off your plate because you aren’t risking anything. You are simply asking the basic question, which is what the two of you were doing with your eyes in the first place.
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